Friday, September 16, 2005


I am aware that solitude works to increase my altered state creativity. However, the problem with this solitude is that it often is sof illd with my own machinations that I forget about the real world surrounding me. I forget about other parts of the world where folks are less blessed with material items; there are hungering children, starving from the lack of the same material items that I take for granted.

Then, I feel like I ought to be acting differentely; I ought to be involved in some way to make a difference in the world out there.

Of course, such involvement increses the risk that I will have to leave this isolated tower in which I have everything I need to survive qite comfortably, thank you.

I listen to the news daily. I pay attention to the political situation and criticize those in power because they do not do more to make a differnce for those who have less than we do, but my integrity has a gigantic hole, a chasm of egotism and disregard for those less fortuante that I am. I do nothing to make a difference. I take no stand. I write nothing to help them. I do not spend my time on their behalf.

I feel guilty, but not guilty enough to step out of my home to make a difference in their world.

Confessing to you makes absolutely no difference. I supose the Catholic church thought that such confession would do its memebers some good. Obviously, they were wrong.

It's a glorious day here in Oz. The greens of the fig tree wilderness are greener than ever. The blue skies are more blue than one could imagine. There is no suffering within my visual field. For now.